In My Mind I'm Goin' to Carolina

For quite a few years, I have periodically grieved for and missed your Dad, specifically as the younger man I married. Another time I will write about the early years of our relationship.  

For now as the finality of his passing settles in, I'm going to write briefly about one of his favorite things to do - going to the Outer Banks. I do have fond memories of staying especially in Hatteras in a house along a canal. Alex, you loved it there since you could walk out the door to fish. And we were close to the beach and the fishing pier that brought hours of joy for you Alex. Rob, you were quite little and enjoyed it a lot although we know you are not generally a beach aficionado. I got to rest, and Dad spent a lot of time driving us about and maintaining fishing gear, getting bait and taking fish off lines. We usually took a day trip to Ocracoke Island, involving trips on the ferry which were an adventure every time. On our journeys across the Chesapeake Bay Bridge Tunnel, we would stop at the visitor center, walk out to pier to see what fish were being caught and sometimes watch a container ship go over the tunnel. Maybe you remember a blueberry fight in the back seat of the car, which happened on our way home one year. It's nice to remember summer vacation (especially during mid-winter), and important for me to believe that when we meet again in heaven we will be the best versions of ourselves. Below are pictures from a trip to the Wright Brother's Memorial in Kitty Hawk in 2003, and cute pictures you both from 2006.

Welcome to Number #46

I last wrote about politics after the general election, and as it happened just before the election was called for Joe Biden.  So much has happened since then!  I learned when Dad was involved in Wyoming Boro politics for a number of years that sometimes you are in the majority, other times in the minority.  Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose.  Well unfortunately, Donald Trump could not bring himself to lose gracefully.  He never conceded the election, in fact he fought in the courts on trying to challenge what all credible sources determined was a fair election and did not facilitate transition to the new administration.  And in the end, the biggest catastrophe of all, on the day of Dad's funeral (so we didn't learn of it until later in the day) while the electoral college vote was being counted in Congress he spoke to a large, angry group of his supporters who were fully prepared for violence.  These people then rioted and stormed the capitol building. After endangering our country's legislators and Vice President Pence, doing damage and a couple deaths, we acknowledge that it was extremely bad but could have been worse.  What type of people bring the makings of a gallows and then build it in any public place, let alone in our nation's capital?  Many will face criminal charges, and President Trump was impeached in the House (second time) for inciting an insurrection.

After 4 tumultuous years, I am truly grateful and relieved that the Trump presidency is over.  Here is an email that I drafted in October 2020, but never sent:  

Dear Vice President Joe Biden

This is such an anxious time for our country.  You and your wife Dr. Biden give us hope.  Every day we put our Joe Biden flag out, every night we "bring in Joe" for safekeeping here in Luzerne County.  We look forward to election day and then your inauguration, when you'll take over as President of our wonderful and struggling country.  We can't wait for a child of Scranton, my husband's home-town, and Wilmington, a short drive from where I grew up in South Philadelphia, to bring us competence, a platform to distribute more resources to those who don't have privilege and be accountable for leadership on so many issues around the world, basic common decency and genuine concern for all Americans.  Thank you for everything you have done for our country and will continue to do as you face the challenges of your presidency.  

Tonight we contributed to your campaign.  We will always be rooting for you and Jill.

Christine Rivers & Stephen Albert

West Pittston, PA

PS.  In addition to her many qualifications, Kamala Harris has a wonderful smile - like a ray of sunshine through the clouds !

The inauguration was last Wednesday.  I'm sorry we didn't go this time, but it wasn't feasible due to COVID 19 and other circumstances including Washington D.C. being an armed camp.  I already made a date with you Rob to go to the next inauguration in four years.  I truly enjoyed watching the inauguration, and my favorite part was Lady Gaga's rendition of the national anthem.  She is beautiful, her dress and pin are fabulous and what an unbelievable performer !!  I will share more about her in a future post.  Watching the video below, you will see over her left shoulder a man who looks a lot like Uncle Jason!  Regrettably, it's not - I texted Jay about it later in the day.  LOL!

Your Dad June 13, 1960 - January 2, 2021

Alex, you were the first to get the news a week ago.  TJ called to tell you that Dad had passed.  We began to get details over the next couple days, since we have not known his whereabouts for over three years (he last stopped at Montgomery Ave. in June of 2017).  We know Dad received good care, thankfully.  There are so many emotions now, I will not try to comment on them.  

We were supported by Joe Kopcza of Metcalfe-Shaver-Kopcza Funeral Home, who helped with necessary decisions and arrangements.  Here are the friends and family who came to share their condolences with you, Aunt Pam and me this past Wednesday, January 6th:

• Keith, a former neighbor from 7th Street
• Jesse Kugler, who said told us she is a Trans-Med driver who got to know Dad when she took him to appointments
• Taylor Schechter
• Becky Stitzer
• Julie Fumanti and Jeff Polidori
• Rev. Jen Baer
• Jim and Laura Balint
• Paul Konopka
• George Krizenoskas
• Rev. Martha Jordan
• Aunt Julie
• Grammie and Grandad
• Laura Lewis Emmett

We had good weather, with just a little snow on the ground.  Our family sent lovely flower arrangements. The framed picture above was displayed for us to remember a happy day.  It's from the day of your baptism, Rob, in November 2002.  Alex, you were 5 years old.  Jesse told us that Dad continued to love you and spoke about you often.  And know that you were both meant to be here, and have important contributions to make to this world as Carroll men.  

Robert Rexford Carroll passed into eternal life on Saturday, Jan. 2, 2021, at Timber Ridge Heath Care Center, Wilkes-Barre, following an illness.

Bob Carroll lived most of his life in Wyoming where he was involved in various community activities.

Born June 13, 1960, in Pittston, he was the son of Robert D. and Gladys Warner Carroll, who predeceased him.

Bob attended Wyoming Presbyterian Church with his family. As a youth, he was an Eagle Scout and achieved the distinction of membership in the Order of the Arrow. Bob graduated from Wyoming Area High School in 1978, and from King's College, Wilkes-Barre, in 1983. During college, he was a counselor at Camp Lackawanna, Tunkhannock, where he formed lifelong friendships. He worked for American General Life Insurance Company for the majority of his career. Bob is a past Wyoming Borough Councilman. Over the years, he was a leader of Boy Scout Troop 366 in West Wyoming, a member of the Wyoming/West Wyoming Lions Club and a Board member of the Wyoming Cemetery Association.

In earlier years, Bob enjoyed canoeing, hiking, camping and gardening. He loved vacationing in particular to the Outer Banks, North Carolina. He was extremely interested in current events, especially politics, and was an avid collector of Lionel model trains.

Bob is survived by his sons, Alexander F. Carroll and Robert B. Carroll, West Pittston; and his sister, Pamela R. Carroll, Dallas. He is also survived by an aunt, Betty Warner; and numerous cousins.

Remember Bob for his charm, intellect and sense of humor. May he rest in peace.

Funeral services will be held at 11 a.m. Wednesday at Metcalfe Shaver Kopcza Funeral Home Inc., 504 Wyoming Ave., Wyoming, with the Rev. Jennifer Baer of the Trinity Presbyterian Church of Dallas officiating.

Interment will be in the Wyoming Cemetery.

Friends may call from 10 to 11 a.m. Wednesday at the funeral home.

In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made to Camp Lackawanna, Tunkhannock, PA through the Presbytery of Lackawanna office or the Camp's website.

Misericordia U Graduation (COVID style)

Well Alex, it has happened!!  The long awaited and hard-won college diploma will be in your hands shortly.  You have worked so hard, and it shows since you graduated from Misericordia "magna cum laude" as indicated in the Misericordia University commencement booklet you can see below (it arrived after commencement, probably due to a USPS mail backlog that got worse as December wore on).  It is really thrilling that you've done it !!!

Graduation was on Sunday Dec. 20th at 11 am.  You weren't too interested in a traditional graduation ceremony, so this turned out to be perfect.  You told me that all you had to do was get up half an hour early, pull a gown over your pajamas and a cap on your head (that we later learned were Taylor's from her Slippery Rock graduation) and log into Zoom.  Steve did too, it was a nice surprise for us to see you in formal graduation attire, and of course your teachers' academic regalia - makes me think of Hogwarts/Harry Potter, and also remember how I enjoyed graduation pomp & circumstance especially for my Wilkes U masters degree.  The program went about an hour, and was highlighted by thoughtful and inspiring comments from your professors in particular Dr. Carso and a bit later Dr. Stevens - who are clearly and rightfully proud of the Gov't, Law and National Security program they have built up (including their ability to match students to meaningful internships in spite of COVID challenges).  Plus it was a novelty for each student to have the opportunity to talk about what the program has meant to them.  You mentioned how you had been challenged by your class work, especially in Dr. Padot's courses.  I was excited to be part of the ceremony, a bit weepy at times and am so proud of your accomplishments.  Rob joined us in Steve's office mid-way through the proceedings.  Here are some very nice pictures, most of them from Taylor - thank you Taylor!!   So now it's on to new ventures as you begin the full-time job search process.  No matter what comes next, you have a solid foundation and have developed skills (including excellent writing and presentation skills) that will be invaluable in years to come in your career and potentially in a graduate program.  Yahoo !!!!

And the Waiting Goes On

It's been a long, distracted week.  Although the general election was on Tuesday, it's now Saturday and we still don't know the final outcome of the presidential race.  Some disturbing things are happening this week, with President Trump trying to undermine vote counting and other threats to the voting system.  Truly, it feels like our democracy is unstable.  At this point, neither Donald Trump nor Joe Biden have the minimum number of electoral college votes (270) to win.  Joe Biden won the popular vote.  Due to COVID-19, many states have expanded access to mail-in voting and millions of people voted via mail.  However, the counting process for these votes is slow so we still don't have national results.  Here are the current standings, per the AP:

2020 US election results

Live

Updated at 10:29 AM EST

All states

President

Senate

House

Ballot measures

Presidential results

From The Associated Press

The Associated Press has not called this race · Learn more

Joe Biden

264

270 to win

Donald Trump

214

Won

Leads

Candidates		Electoral votes	Vote %	Vote count
Joe Biden Democratic Party		264	50.6%	74,816,073
Donald Trump Republican Party		214	47.7%	70,556,076

Show more

Swing states

From The Associated Press

Biden

Trump

Georgia

16 electoral votes · 99% reporting

49.5%2,461,455

49.3%2,454,207

Nevada

6 electoral votes · 87% reporting

49.8%632,558

48%609,901

North Carolina

15 electoral votes · 99% reporting

48.7%2,656,303

50.1%2,732,782

Pennsylvania

20 electoral votes · 99% reporting

49.6%3,337,069

49.2%3,308,192

Arizona

11 electoral votes · 90% reporting

49.7%1,604,067

48.8%1,574,206

Florida

29 electoral votes · 99% reporting

47.9%5,284,453

51.2%5,658,847

Pennsylvania is in the thick of it, and is currently learning toward Biden.  Luzerne County did go for Trump, as in 2016.  So we wait and hope it will be over TODAY.  

In the meantime, we keep busy with work, school and plenty of menu planning & food preparation (with COVID rates increasing, we have stopped going to restaurants again other than take-out).  As a quick update, Alex you called me last week so very happy that you met with your Gov't, Law & National Security advisor and are confirmed to graduate in December.  It is the end of over 5 years of college study, and I am thrilled for you and proud that you've reached this huge milestone.  Rob, in the meantime you are checking out Pennsylvania college programs for chemical engineering with virtual information sessions and then unofficial campus visits.  This week we drove to Bucknell, likely we'll get to Lehigh later this month.  Exciting!!  

The video below that Steve found on YouTube is hilarious.  As an alternative to thinking about troubling things that are going on, it should make you laugh.

The Path Forward

This fall is a time of uncertainty for our country.  What will happen over the next several months?  

Our Leadership:  I just found an on-line count-down clock to the 2020 general election - you can see a copy from a couple minutes ago.  Never in my lifetime has an upcoming election seemed so consequential.  The direction of our country will be so different under a second term of President Trump's administration vs. a President Biden administration.  There are such divergent opinions, based on different experiences and cultural roots.  With income distributions skewed toward middle and upper classes, lower class workers have been under increasing levels of economic stress for decades.  Along with that stress comes so many issues for individuals and families that are not being addressed adequately in our society.  In our fantastically wealthy country with living standards most of the world can only dream about, not enough resources are being shared to provide basic housing, health services, food and education.  What will be done about this going forward, to help relieve the depression, anger and desperation of many Americans?

2020 US Presidential Election

16	days
392	hours
23569	minutes
1414181	seconds

until Tuesday, November 3, 2020 (Washington DC, District of Columbia time)

---

It is 16 days, 8 hours, 49 minutes, 41 seconds

Our World:  Over the past couple years, it has become obvious that human activity is drastically changing our climate.  There have been unprecedented, devastating wildfires (Australia, the US west coast), hurricanes & typhoons, floods and wind storms.  The truth is we are way behind in taking action to head off the worst implication of climate change.  Your generation recognizes these threats for what they are - and will force important decisions on how we cut carbon emissions, use cleaner fuels and incent industries and society to make fundamental changes.  

Racism:  During 2020, there has been a more honest reckoning with ourselves as Americans about the damage and pain caused by various forms of racism.  But especially involving people of color, relating to unequal treatment - most notably by law enforcement and the legal system.  Our country's roots in violence and slavery need to be understood more broadly, and pro-actively addressed by all of us.  In your generation, you will be help to decide how we can eliminate apathy about the unacceptable differences in the real opportunities and life experience of Blacks, Hispanics, Native Americans and others including recent immigrants.

Pandemic:  Coming back to the immediate future, what is going to happen with COVID-19?  As October passes by, in many parts of the country the infection and death rates are going up (wave two in some places like the Northeast, wave one in others).  Will the federal government provide better guidance, communicate better standards and will our leaders be better role models?  Will all states take more a more uniform, practical approach to decreasing transmission risks?  Will individuals make better decisions including about the simple things - social distancing and wearing masks?  I found out this week that Prudential will require most employees to work remotely at least until July, 2021.  Rob, your senior year at Wyoming Area has been fully remote as well.  Alex, Misericordia still has a hybrid format - but you are wondering how long that can last.  Steve is just started work, on-site, at Goodwill Industries in Scranton.  It's very sobering.  Besides addressing the current pandemic, it is essential to understand the risk of future epidemics in our world.

The next big decision point will be election day - Nov. 3, 2020.  Rob, you are voting for the first time this fall (due to the pandemic, we are all mailing ballots rather than going to polls in person) - congratulations!  In fact, I mailed your ballot today.  I'm certainly anxious about what is coming next.  I so much hope that all of us, including the powerful older white men who have the greatest say in running this amazing country, will be strategic in changing our national priorities as we navigate changes to our planet and society while the United States of America stays true to its origins as a democratic nation.

The "Notorious" RBG

Guys, today I'm going to write about why the women's rights movement means so much to us.  I've thought about this in various ways over the years, but never organized my thoughts until now after watching remembrances of Ruth Bader Ginsburg.  She died this month at age 87.  I normally don't post long pieces in this blog, figuring that you would have little interest, but this time is different.  The CBS Sunday Morning video below captures her life, including incredible contributions that have changed our country.  The book "Notorious RBG: The Life and Times of Ruth Bader Ginsburg" was written about 5 years ago.  It inspired a documentary, meme's, t-shirts, etc., which she herself embraced.  Supreme Court Justice Ginsburg became a pop icon - it is fantastic that she was recognized for her tremendous accomplishments during her lifetime.

First of all, the women's suffrage movement of the 1800's and early 1900's culminated in passage of a constitutional amendment extending voting rights to women.  That was in 1919, only a hundred years ago.  Rob, we learned about some of this history and local leadership at the Rochester Museum this summer.

To connect this topic to our family, Grandnana Phyllis McCausland graduated from Radcliffe College (sister school to Harvard University).  She worked in New York City, I believe assisting at a law office, while Great Grandad Burke Rivers went to divinity school there.  When he graduated, they got married and moved to New Haven, CT to his first parish.  It was then the early 1930's.  She told me that married women were not expected to work at all, since this was seen as taking a job away from a man.  Grammie worked as a teacher while Grandad went to divinity school in Cambridge, MA in the early 1960's after they married.  After kids came along, she worked periodically as a teacher in private schools.  In her generation, thanks to leaders such as RBG, women began to break through the "glass ceiling" in professions that were historically dominated by men.  Luckily for us, the Rivers, McCausland, Zeller and Rowe families valued education (all 4 of my grandparents graduated from college) and set expectations early on that we kids would go to college.

In the 1970's in particular, women fought for opportunities in various professions and began to rise in the management ranks.  Our former pastor Laura Lewis was one of the pioneers in financial services in Northeast PA.  She joined First Eastern Bank as a management trainee (which I did as well, about 10 years later); she and a colleague became the first women promoted to Vice President at the Bank.  As you know, she is intelligent, articulate and hard working - and I believe became a VP about age 30, quite a feat.  This took place under the watch of Bank President Tom Kylie (hopefully his name is spelled right), who later got to know me during a college internship at the Wilkes-Barre Chamber of Commerce.  His interest in me paved the way for me to join First Eastern Bank right after graduating from King's College in 1986.  

Since pay has not kept pace with the cost of living, in my lifetime it has become increasingly difficult for families to get by with only one working parent.  I expect you assume that you and your future spouse/partner will both work full time, for the most part (this is not easy with young kids, but you will figure that out).  It doesn't hurt to remember that opportunities for women in your generation are built on a legal and societal foundation that is quite recent.  If I had not been able to establish a career for myself and had the means to be independent, it would have been much more difficult for me to separate, get divorced and continue to provide for you.  And as a bonus, help you both get college educations.  I feel incredibly fortunate that we live in this time and I'm grateful to the many women who worked long and hard fighting for gender equity.  You should be too.